The Natural Man

2008-07-16T17:07:00.045-04:00

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Introduction

A collection of poems with a person as the sole subject matter may seem presumptuous and smack of hero-worship and religious cultism. Why should anyone but the writer be interested in such an act of adoration? Who is this U.G.?

Once there was a person called U.G. He grew up like everyone else, went to school, practiced various spiritual disciplines, married, had children, went practically insane, and by some chance what has been called 'the Calamity' happened to him. And then that person ceased to be. The physical organism is still here. Some habits, conditioning, and memories are still present, without, however, any force behind them, for the person who previously tied them together is now gone.

Once the person called U.G. ceased to be, Universal Energy manifested itself through U.G.'s organism. Somehow, in some inexplicable way, this Energy now seems to use all the peculiarities of whatever U.G. was in the past—his conditioning, idiosyncracies and patterns of living, indeed U.G.'s voice and his body—without being bound by any of them, to relate to the world. U.G. now functions as a Being among beings. He is "a finely-tuned instrument", responding and relating to everyone around him and yet capable of changing with circumstances with great ease. Depending on whom he is dealing with at the moment, the Universal Energy that is now U.G. may appear assertive or yielding, ruthless or loving, and yet free from the divisions of the self. (U.G. calls this state of his the "natural state", whence the title of this book.)

Although we see and deal with U.G. on the surface as a person like us, yet, inasmuch as we come to realize that he cannot be known through any pattern, we begin to suspect that there may be no person as U.G. at all. At any moment, in any context, we attribute certain characteristics to him, but we know that at the next turn we are liable to be proven wrong, that he may turn out to be the exact opposite, and that all our attributions are merely interpretations and projections based on our own predilictions, background, and self-centered interests.

Yet U.G. is nothing outside of these attributions. We do not know what to do with him. When we are ready to throw out our own hang-ups, we begin to suspect that there is nothing there in U.G. except this Energy, and that this Energy is also in us, and everywhere. And we see that U.G., being that Energy, by constantly hitting and upsetting our interests, goals, aspirations, fears and whatnot, in other words, by striking at the dam of the self in us, is continually attempting to reestablish the unity of existence. Whether he succeeds or not is not his concern. And, of course, our suspicion that there may be no person called U.G. "there" brings into question the reality of our own person.

Such an Energy calls forth itself in its dealings with us. No wonder we feel in U.G.'s presence that excitement, that sense of "unsettlement", that existential dread, that sense we may be "freaking out", and that surge of the feeling of utter love.

Larry's poems reveal his response of personal devotion to U.G., his bhakti, as well as express his attempts—adequate or otherwise—to come to grips with U.G.'s extraordinary impact on his life. If sheer exuberance of Energy, that excitement, that pounding of the heart, and a feeling of melting into an abyss in response to U.G. , is bhakti, then Larry's poems express bhakti. How can Larry, or we, contain ourselves if an opening is made in us, thanks to our at least temporary readiness to let go of our guard, and an Energy bursts out? This Energy keeps on coming, blasting and expressing itself in spite of our doubts, fears, hopes, despairs, petty and selfish desires, our bickerings, and our clingings.

Yet, inspite of these phenomenal outbursts, we mostly keep falling back on our own resources; we don't trust this Energy and we keep shutting it off through our calculations and fears. This Energy is constantly drawing us toward freedom—freedom from self-concern, freedom from all the turmoil of existence, freedom to dance in joy with life, freedom to live a carefree existence. U.G.'s example shows us how utterly easy it is to change with all that is changing around us. It is our concern for ourselves which makes us so dreadfully serious, as we drag our existence, heavily-laden on our backs, for what may seem like an eternity. When shall we be free if not now? And how best to be free except by letting go of every concern including the concern to be free?

Larry has known U.G. since the mid-eighties and has been writing these poems ever since he met U.G. Larry's response to U.G. was immediate and continuous: he has written over two hundred poems, and the present work respresents a selection of them. These poems are simple and elegant. They vibrate with sincerity, feeling and vitality. Many of the poems depict a concrete aspect of U.G., say his cooking or shopping, his hands or his eyes, and go on to reveal how Larry is affected by it, or rather how each of these aspects are an occasion of U.G.'s love. Some others describe Larry's own condition—which is ours too—of forlorness, and some of his ecstatic joy. Larry understands what U.G. is after—that is, removing all that is false and sham in us (some of the poems describe this condition of ours) which we normally confuse with our true self. And Larry is bidding U.G. to "finish him off".

How many of us across the world have been touched by U.G. may not be apparent to the general reader: we have felt and been moved by what we understand as his unconditional love, the great joy and laughter that surrounds him, his wrath and fury, his utter ruthlessness, the "good" feeling we experience when we are with him—the feeling that we are so special, the feeling of intimacy and understanding, as also by the utter simplicity of his living, and above all by the Presence of a vastly powerful and profoundly Creative Intelligence. (We know that U.G. himself would brush all this aside with one sweep of his hand as our own projections.) And Larry too has experienced U.G.'s unconditional love and the absolute peace that surrounds U.G.; he sings of the ways he is touched by U.G. and of his longing for U.G. This is where an answer could be found to the question of "Who would be interested in a collection of poems concerning one man?"

Like the Heart Sutra, which reflects our emptiness to ourselves and invokes the great Emptiness that is in us all, Larry's poems open us to U.G. and the great Love and Joy that is in us, too.

J.S.R.L. Narayana Moorty
Seaside, California

U.G. (Magical, Mystical)

2007-07-07T08:00:00.000-04:00

Magical, mystical, mad
Spiritual vacuum cleaner
       U.G.
Male/Female
Passive/Active
Demonic/Chthonic
       U.G.
Brain damaged?
Holy saint
with quick fluid motions
So quick
beyond thinking
Outside of all categories
Death-in-life
Life-in-death
       U.G.
One of a kind
None of a kind
outside of all paths
beyond all teachings
more real than the Real
Fire let loose
on earth
too beyond our waking
to see.
Hard to feel so much
Energy
and still be us
upsetting all our notions
shattering all our devotions
demolishing all our potions
I dissolve
You dissolve
We dissolve.
Thank God
for U.G.

Super Natural

2005-07-09T12:08:00.000-04:00

Cleaning
Cooking
Walking
Talking
always
he
is
one
with
what is.
Examining
minutely
cardboard
boxes
at
the
Price
Club.
Contemplating
Nothingness
with
Profundity.
What a Joy
to be with you
U.G.—
How our hearts
open
to your
exquisite
baffling
unfathomable
Presence.
No end
to this Energy—
No end
to this Joy.

Nuclear Generator

2005-07-09T12:07:00.000-04:00

The
Energy
starts
somewhere
in
this
body
works
its
way
up
spiraling
through
the
head
shoots
into
the
heavens
bounces
off
the
sky.

The Finished Man

2005-07-09T12:06:00.000-04:00

He
has
given
us
Everything.
His
own
completion.
We
are
the
nothing
he
is
always
offering
us
to
see
ourselves
as.
We
are
as
he
is
too.
Two
Nothingnesses
when
they
meet
produce
a
Great
Nothing.
So
Freeing
to
meet
our
own
Not-ness.
Thanks
for
the Nothingness
Mr.
U.G.,
Sir.

Spiritual Detergent

2005-07-09T12:05:00.000-04:00

If U.G. didn't exist
we would have to invent him.
We do anyway.
A figment
of our
Joyous Dread.
We're always happy
to be with U.G.
because he takes it all away—
wipes our slate clean.
After U.G.,
there's nothing left to anguish over;
No Anguisher left either.
"I will pull the chair,
the carpet,
the very ground you are
standing on."
Not much left after
U.G.
finishes us.
"I am become death."
That's why we flee
in Joy to him
each time
to receive the Great Gift
of self-release.
When we're not,
it's so easy
to just be.

Angel Hair

2005-07-09T12:01:00.000-04:00

He
slams
the
pasta
package
on
the
table
rearranges
the
tiny
noodles
in
delicate
new
configurations.
Can
we
put
our
scattered
lives
in
those
quick
strong
hands
and
let
them
sort
us
out
set
us
free?
Quickly
in
the
silence
we
say
yes.
Anything
whatever
the
scary
cost
we'll
pay.
Loose
us
from
the
tangles
forever.

Calm Disclosure

2005-07-09T12:00:00.000-04:00

Chiseled
features
erect
upright
posture
U.G.
centered
in
the
allness
floating
our
way
through
the
multitude
of
our
distractions
reaching
us
with
ineffable
peace.
How
Good!

Karma Scooper

2005-07-09T11:59:00.000-04:00

U.G.
with
one
swift
flickering
glance
he
scoops
up
all
the
uncertainty
at
the
pit
of
our
stomachs
as
if
it
were
no
gift
at
all.

The Hidden Answer Is Obvious

2005-07-09T11:57:00.000-04:00

U.G.—
still
as
a
forest
wild
as
a
volcanic
eruption
unpredictable
unknown
a
vast
scary
secret
begging
to
be
discovered
revealing
everything
open
to
everything
sharing
everything
still
baffling
obvious
like
our
life.

Unbenumbed

2005-07-09T11:56:00.000-04:00

U.G.
exists
for us
(if at all)
within
the
spaces
between
our
thoughts.
Our
thoughts
bubble
up
on
divided
sides:
"should I
or
shouldn't I"
"will I
or
won't I"
until
they
reach
a
peak
of
conflicted
union
a
tiny
explosion
the bubble
bursts
Ah,
U.G.
again.

Declenched

2005-07-09T11:55:00.000-04:00

Let go
Drop it
set it free
let it be
that
ancient
grimy
self
too
long
preoccupied
with itself.
Every
thought
another
excuse
for
not
freeing—
time
stops
now
no thought
left
to think
itself.

Phoning the Void

2005-07-09T11:54:00.000-04:00

did
you say?"
"Nothing."
It
was
only
the
echo
of
our
great
uncertainty
anxiously
seeking
to
be
filled
or
reassured
or
at
least
numbed
with
hope
instead
the
great
silence
booms
back
to
us
a
Peace
beyond
reckoning.

Time with U.G

2005-07-09T11:53:00.000-04:00

How
quickly
we
reach
for
what
isn't
yet
there
or
has
already
come
and
gone.
U.G.'s
peace
takes
away
from
us
the
grasping
after
a
joy
that
left
us
long
ago
offers
instead
the
intensity
of
this
vast
instant
he
realizes
us
in.

Sunken Treasure

2005-07-09T11:49:00.000-04:00

Extraordinary
clarity
alertness
Energy
comes
from
"sinking"
deeply
into
the abyss.
The motor
of
self
shuts
off.
All
is
quiet.
Nothing
left
to
think
no
thinker
left
either.
End
of
the
line
at
last
till
sputtering
transfusion:
New
Life
and
all
begins
again.

Driving Under the Influence

2005-07-09T11:48:00.000-04:00

Driving
Mr. U.G.
Foot to trembling pedal
brake brake brake
hope I don't
blow it
doing 20
in
a
50 zone
oops almost hit
that one
hope
I make it
going soooooo
slow . . .
with
that
eerie
presence
next to me
E.T.
the
Man
from
the
moon.
My
shy
heart
racing
faster
than
the
car
ah,
U.G.

U.G. Attack

2005-07-09T11:45:00.001-04:00

"Have a candy"
kindly
sweet
Uncle
U.G.
Just
eat
this
Super Lemon Drop
all
will
be
well
as
we
die
for
the
absolute
last
time
we
suck
the
bitter
acid
flavor
as
we
dissolve
into
basic
oblivion
we
got
nothing
but
U.G.
and
U.G.'s
got
nothing
but...
us?

U.G. City

2005-07-09T11:44:00.001-04:00

Out of two million
people
and
Oh,
so many possibilities
for distraction
there's really
nowhere
to be
in this city
but with U.G.
in
the
little
shuttered
room
at
the
top
of
the
stairs
leading
to
Never
again.

So Many Followers

2005-07-09T11:42:00.000-04:00

Were led
to
follow
a
path
that
took
them
straight
out
of
the
way
into
a
No way.
U.G.
please show me
the
No Way.
"No Way!"
Every thought
is
a
postponement.
Every question
already
knows
the
answer.
Every
movement
keeps
us
in
bondage.
Even
hopelessness
is
a
vague
hope
of
the
mind.
So stop
here
Now,
already.

Man for the Kali Yuga

2005-07-09T11:38:00.000-04:00

"Truth
is
the
only
mantra
for
the
Kali
Yuga."
When
we
meet
Truth
we
stammer
stutter
fall apart
gasp
groan
Oh, No!
we
try
so
brave
to
act
like
we
know
what's what
we're
hip
cool
open
undisguised
finally
revealing
really ourselves
really...
until
we
meet
Truth
and
Truth
in
one
flickering glance
sees
through
all
of
our
deceptions
then
moves
on
(through compassion?)
to talk
of other things.

Fatal Attraction

2005-07-09T11:35:00.000-04:00

We
are
drawn
to
U.G.
Moths
circling
so
carefully
the
flame
knowing
our
destiny
yet
what
else
can
we
do
the
sheer
joy
of
this
oblivion
pulling us
into
itself.

Nothing to Do, Nowhere to Go

2005-07-09T11:34:00.000-04:00

Nothing
is
happening—
No
one
to
be
just
hanging
out
in
the
void
with
U.G.
Every
thought
sets
a
goal
we
automatically
cancel
"Why
bother"
yet
still
all
this
energy
peace
freedom.
Nobody
cares
who
we
are
here.
What
a
release
from
ourselves
our
needing
to
be
Somebody—
yet
not
Nobody
either—
Just
here
orbiting
around
a
Quantum
Leap.

Still Envelope

2005-07-09T11:32:00.000-04:00

When
we
are
with
U.G.
we
feel
hermetically
sealed
in
his
calm
peace
No
virtue
to
us
this
stillness
which
we
would
truly
love
to
earn
but
can't
and
have
no
way
to
get
there
almost
we
feel
guilty
for
so
much
unearned
peace...
without even trying?

Selfless

2005-07-09T11:29:00.000-04:00

The
Man
with
no
image
walks
in
front
of
a
plate glass
window.
Startled
by
the
reflected
stranger
he
jumps
back
then
realizes:
"It's
me?"

U.G.'s Voice

2005-07-09T11:27:00.001-04:00

I've
heard
gravelly
old
Zen
Masters'
voices
and
satiny
young
Yogis'
voices
severe
Swamis'
voices
elderly
dignified
mystics'
voices
(with
Angels
in
the
background)
I've
heard
serene
Sikhs
with
steady
voices
phlegmy
old
cabalistic
voices
powerful
Christian
prophet
voices
but
never
never
until
U.G.
has
a
voice
split
my
heart
wide
open.

Explanation

2005-07-09T11:26:00.000-04:00

We
hang out
with
U.G.
Ice
packs
for
our
sore
hearts
to
freeze
ease?
the
terror
of
our
aloneness.

The Man Who Wasn't There

2005-07-09T11:25:00.000-04:00

No
linkage
between
the
frames
in
his
eyes
Nothing
hooks
together
no
images
So
no
self
So
no
Love?
How
come
there
is
so
much
Love?

U.G.'s Company

2005-07-09T11:20:00.001-04:00

We
blurt
out
just
what
we
don't
want
to
say.
We
got
caught
by
the
camera
looking
just
like
we
don't
want
to
look
all
our
façades
crumble
in
your
thin
smile
you
don't
even
have
to
shout
we
melt
anyway.

U.G.'s Eyes

2005-07-09T11:15:00.001-04:00

When
you
look
at
me
do
you
see
everything?
In the midst
of
small talk
happy gossip
your darting
eyes
looking
everywhere
inside
me.
No
place
to
hide
from
that
penetrating
glance
that
shows
me
the
parts
I
can't
bring
myself
to
see

Word Bullet — I

2005-07-09T11:13:00.000-04:00

Cuts
your
thought
in
two
stops
the
flow
of
images
breaks
the
connection
leaves
you
dangling
suspended
Nowhere
between
two
thoughts.

U.G.'s Power Suit

2005-07-09T11:11:00.001-04:00

Dressed
for
success
in
a
brown
turtle-neck
at
each
step
the
earth
changes
its
mind
so
much
energy
such
innocence
How
could
he
not
succeed?

Being Perfect Has Nothing to Do with It

2005-07-09T11:10:00.000-04:00

It's
something
different
from
all
that.
To
come
to
the
end
of
usefulness,
therefore
all
the
more
dangerous.
So
different!
How
can
we
imagine
it?
We
can't.

Love

2005-07-09T11:08:00.000-04:00

With
one
tiny
flicker
of
a
glance
Love
sees
us
completely
knows
us
through
and
through
and
Loves
us
anyway.

U.G.'s Ears

2005-07-09T11:06:00.001-04:00

Like the tears of
Shiva
How great are those
all-encompassing ears
Jivan-Mukta—
Bringing us home
to our not
being here
How grateful we are
for those precious
Big Beautiful
ears—
hearing our everythingness
thank you
No-one-there
for being here
for us
in our nothingness
trying-to-be-something
How can we
possibly
escape
the Love
of those eyes
the Joyous terror
of those
vast
ears?

Cosmic Naxalite

2005-07-09T11:03:00.000-04:00

Destroyer
of
dreams
shatterer
of
illusions
how
your
terrible
words
hurt
our
ears
lay
waste
our
tiny
hopes
for
more
postponements
from
being
finished
with
being
finished
with
the
useless
life
how
we
long
to
hear
something
of
value
to
hang on
to
when
all
else
fails
instead
you
strip
away
the last
shred
of
belief
in
our
own
self-fantasy
how
awful
your
words
how
terrible
your
silences
nevertheless
you're
right.

Shiva's Tomb

2005-07-09T11:01:00.000-04:00

Abandon
hope
as
we
enter
the
dimly-lit
room
awaiting
the
dissolving
in
the
hot
stuffy
room
we
are
butter
in
the
frying
pan
we
don't
have
a
chance.

Formers

2005-07-09T11:00:00.000-04:00

Former
directors
advisors
teachers
preachers
leaders
spiritual
giants
wowing
them
in
the
suburbs
where
are
these
spiritual
athletes
now?
where
are
the
Kudos
the
Kriyas
where's
the
Shakti
the
Satori
the
bliss
one
tiny
U.G.
smile
all
is
lost
time
to
wake
up
be
ourselves
ordinary
schleps
waiting
on tables
somewhere
all
the
grandiosity
taken
away
in
one
fell
swoop
one
look
from
Those
Eyes
we're
hooked
how
can
we
ever
escape
into
Nirvana
again?

Transfixed

2005-07-09T10:56:00.000-04:00

The
Eyes
had
us
cornered.
No
way
out.
No
escape.
I
thought
I
could
get
away
by
pretending
that
time
mattered.
But
here
I
am
still
those
Eyes
demanding
"let it go!"
"drop it!"

Everybody's Happy but Me

2005-07-09T10:55:00.000-04:00

Because
I'm
not
there
yet
Because
I
need
more
time
They
had
a
head start
I
need
more
instruction
My
aura
is leaking?
I
need
to
go
on
a
trip
lose
weight
forgive my mother
find
the
right
spiritual
teacher
who
'understands'
me
tell
my
story
have
more
guts
get
away
from
U.G.
move
in
with
him
figure
it
all
out
release
it
try
harder
quit
trying
Then
Then?
Then
I'll
be
happy
too
like everybody else.

K-Mart

2005-07-09T10:52:00.000-04:00

U.G.
drifting
down
the
aisles
alien
transmuted
detached
in
a
sea
of
bustling
hungry
anxious
humanity
U.G.
desireless
in
a
cathedral
of
desire
"I
never
knew
it
would
happen
to
me
like
this."

Driving Lesson

2005-07-09T10:51:00.000-04:00

U.G.
trusts
us
as
he
sits
absolutely
still
as
we
weave
in
and
out
of
harrowing
California
rush-hour
traffic.
He
calmly
reassures
us:
"you
can
have
an
accident
even
with
an
Enlightened
man
in
your
car."
Then
he
sits
so
still
like
a
stone
enveloped
in
an
ocean
of
silence.

Awkward to the Max

2005-07-09T10:48:00.000-04:00

Around
U.G.
we
feel
uncomfortable
inside
our
skin
we're
like
stone
monuments
to
ourselves
so
unnatural
rigid
tense
unyielding
our
smiles
hang
in
space
held
on
by
wooden
heads
long
tubes
of
empty
heaviness
protecting
what?
We
see
him
so
heavenly
alive
flowing
spontaneous
filled
with
quiet
fire
burning
the
edges
of
our
hearts.
What
can
we
do
but
relax?

Found Out

2005-07-09T10:46:00.000-04:00

"Don't
think—"
U.G.
tells
us
with
a
straight
look—
"I
just
got
off
the
turnip
truck."
How
can
we
hide
our
vast
ineptitude
from
those
searing
eyes
boring
holes
through
our
story
"why
spend
your
money
learning
the
future
I
see
it
in
your
face.
Besides
you
have
none."

Koan

2005-07-09T10:44:00.000-04:00

I
went
to
see
U.G.
and
came
back
disillusioned
with
my
life.
Now
I
can't
go
back
to
U.G.
and
who's
left
to
go
forward?

Beyond Measure

2005-07-09T10:42:00.000-04:00

U.G.
really
is
an
elusive
fish—
not
tied
to
a
framework.
How
can
we
possibly
catch
him?
No
tradition
can
hold
him—
where's
the
reference
point
from
which
to
trap
him?
Even
Zen
Masters
are
at
least
Zennists—
Samadhists
believe
in Samadhi—
mystics
are
mystical.
But
where
is
U.G.?
The
closer
we
look
the
less
he's
there.
Faster
than
speeding
thought.
How
will
we
ever
get
a
net
over
this
one?
Yet
his
freedom
disturbs
us
not
enough
for
us
to
want
what
he
hasn't.

On the Spot

2005-07-09T10:39:00.000-04:00

Too
much
to
lose
with
U.G.
we're
too
dignified
to
relax
around
him
let
our
guards
down
besides
what
difference
will
it
make?
Nothing
is
happening
here
anyway
or
is
it?
Why
should
we
let
go
risk
all
for
what?
Supposing
it
all
can
change?
How
can
we
afford
not
to?

Secret Shredder

2005-07-09T10:37:00.000-04:00

We
bring
our
oh
so
carefully-
guarded
secrets
to
U.G.
expecting
him
to
condone
them
or
condemn
them
instead
he
merely
erases
them
with
a
soft
smile.

Sunyata

2005-07-09T10:36:00.001-04:00

Like
a
splinter
in
the
finger
U.G.
unsettles
our
peace.
He
annoys
our
unhappiness.
He
bores
holes
in
our
non-arrival.
"All
you
have
are
solutions.
Why
are
you
so
fond
of
your answers?
Dump
them!"
But
without
my
family,
my
love,
my
friends,
my
spiritual
path,
my
teachers,
my
convictions—
What
will
be
left?

How Could So Mischievous a Person Become Free?

2005-07-09T10:33:00.000-04:00

Saints
we
understand
deep prayers
we
can
accept
angelic
beings
we
can
at
least
tolerate
but
someone
so
obviously
cynical
and
making
fun
of
us
all
the
time—
he's
the
Realized
One?
Oy veh!

Beware

2005-07-09T10:26:00.000-04:00

U.G.
might
just
track
you
down
like
a
cruise
missile.
Call
you
or
show up
at
your
doorstep
then
what?
Then
all
the
neatly
assembled
pieces
of
your
life
will
shatter
into
Joy.

Disappearing Act

2005-07-09T10:25:00.000-04:00

There's
nothing
like
U.G.'s
Love.
It dissolves
everything
around
It.
Then
It
dissolves
Itself.

U.G.: Man with No Title

2005-07-09T10:23:00.001-04:00

We
go
to
see
U.G.
because
who
else
is there?
Why
go
anywhere
where
we
know
what
we
will
get
when
we
get
there?
With
U.G.
we
only
know
it
will
be
a
surprise.
We
know
we'll
lose
what
we
want
anyway.
It
will
be
an
anguish
of
Joy
so
how
could
we
possibly
not
go.
Plane,
car,
bus,
train
what
difference
the
speed
time
distance
or
way
across
an
ocean
or
a
street—
Just
so
we
get
there,
see
U.G.,
have
all
our
plans
upset
thrown
asunder
and
feel
that
Joyous
dread
in
the
pit
of
our
stomach.

Not Just Inside His Skin

2005-07-09T10:22:00.000-04:00

He's
everywhere.
When
we
see
a
friend
is
it
really
him?
Has
U.G.
suddenly
slipped in
again?
When
we
call
U.G.
who's
doing
the
calling
us
or
him?
When
someone
comes
to
us
from
U.G.
are
they
themselves
or
vehicles
for
him?
It's
said:
great
yogis
can
manifest
three
bodies.
U.G.
not
limited
to
yoga
how many
are
possible?
Bodies
beyond
number
beyond
measure.
No
bottom
here.
No
end
to
this
one.
He
goes
on
and
on
and
on.
How
could
he
possibly
stop?
Who's
that
walking
on
the
water?
Blurred
boundaries?
When
U.G.
eats
are
we
still
hungry?
Who's
that
next
to
us
right
now
breathing
down
our
spiritual
necks
looking
out
at
us
from
our
third
eye?
Ah,
U.G.

Nirvakalpa Heart

2005-07-09T10:18:00.001-04:00

U.G.'s
Love
is
an
ocean
quit
learning
life-saving
techniques
better
we
learn
how
to
drown.

Desolate

2005-07-09T10:17:00.000-04:00

My
friend
U.G.
is
gone
but
not
for
good
he'll
be
back
and
the
heart
pounding
joy
will
begin
again.
How
can
one
person
hit
us
so
hard
shatter
our
foundation
at
the
root
leave
us
gasping
for
breath
but,
Oh,
more
more
more.
Less
than
U.G.
cannot
satisfy
us.

U.G.-itis

2005-07-09T10:14:00.001-04:00

I've
got
a
hole
in
my
soul
my
skin
is
threatening
to
jump
out
of
my
body
I
no
longer
fit
in
anywhere
I'm
burning up
with
dissatisfaction
my
heart
aches
quakes
shakes
the
only
cure
is
U.G.
who
says
it
has
to
get
much
worse
before
I'll
be
brave
enough
to
let go
my
fear.

U.G. Is My Sponsor

2005-07-09T10:13:00.001-04:00

Hi
I'm
Larry
I'm a spiritual glutton
"Hi Larry"
I've
been
wandering
on
the
path
for
a
long
long
long
time.
I
crave
yogis
swamis
lamas
and
various
assorted
gurus.
I
flock
to
see
the
masters
mystics
seers
and
great
sages
of
the
ages.
My
pulse
throbs
my
head
aches
my
knees
buckle
when
in
the
presence
of
teachers
of
the
unseen
mysteries:
New Agers
New Thoughters
No Thoughters
relationists
absolutists
just
so
they're
burning
with
fervor
and
speak
with
the
E.F. Hutton voice.
U.G.
breaks
the
spell
of
my
Guru-itis
grounds
me
in
ordinary
life
a
little gossip
a
joke
a
burst
of
unholy
laughter
pokes
holes
in
my
mystical
longing.
One
soft
word
from
that
quiet
voice
pierces
my
heart
beyond
any
Zen
Master.
One
glance
from
those
darting
eyes
floods
me
with
Love
beyond
any
method
any
path.
Keep
coming
back.
It
works.

U.G.'s Anger

2005-07-09T10:12:00.001-04:00

Cuts
to
the
bone
sears
burns
and cauterizes
our
wounded
ego.
We
would
like
him
to
see
who
we're
not
instead
he
sees
us
dismissing
the false
self
with
a
flick
of
a
glance
only
the
Real
Thing
interests
him.
Too
bad
we're
so
far
away
from
that.

U.G. Free

2005-07-09T10:01:00.000-04:00

Listening
to
the
description
of
a
free
man—
why
listen
anymore
to
just
words
I
am
the
freedom
being
explained.
How
can
you
explain
me?
If
you
can't
see
me
there's
something
wrong
with
your
eyes.
You
want
my
Freedom?
This
Freedom
only
exists
where
you
leave
off.
Come
to
the
end
of
you
and
find
me
there.

The Investigation

2005-07-09T10:00:00.000-04:00

We
went
to
see
U.G.
to
find
out
for
ourselves
if
he
was
really
real.
Instead
we
lost
ourselves.
Now
where's
the
investigator?

U.G. Male/Female

2005-07-09T09:59:00.001-04:00

U.G.
so
filled
with
stern
assertive
masculine
high-powered
energy
blasts
away
at
our
foibles
and
our
fables...
yet
now
he's
incredibly
soft
yielding
absolutely
feminine
the
love
flowing
from
him
to
us
our
mother
lover
sister
Oh
so
gentle
tender
melting
our
hearts.
How
can
we
resist
this
two
pronged
attack
loving
us
into
wholeness?

Butcher's Heart

2005-07-09T09:56:00.000-04:00

U.G.
They
say
you
have
the
heart
of
a
butcher.
Gladly
would
I
lay
myself
before
that
axe:
"Though
He
slay
me,
yet
shall
I
love
Him."

Open-Heart Surgery

2005-07-09T09:55:00.000-04:00

Love
discovers
beauty
that
fear
can
never
see.
U.G.
I
am
forever
grateful
that
my
heart
was
not
closed
when
we
met.
I
never
knew
that
this
kind
of
love
was
possible.
No
books
no
teachers
prepared
me.
Thank
God
my
bitterness
at
life's
dissappointments
could
melt
in
your
quick
shining
eyes
a
love
I
could
never
calculate
could
touch
me
beyond
recall.

Random Bliss

2005-07-09T09:53:00.000-04:00

U.G.
comes
into
our
life
like
a
thunderbolt
fades
out
like
a
dream.
Was
it
Real
for
you
too?
Did
you
touch
the
stars
taste
God
in
the
white
chocolate?
Why
out
of
all
the
billions
were
we
lucky
enough
to
connect?

Happy Accident

2005-07-09T09:50:00.000-04:00

No
one
is
there
to
put
it
all
together.
All
the
King's
horses
all
the
King's
men
can
never
put
U.G.
back
together
Again.

Unwobbling Pivot

2005-07-09T09:18:00.000-04:00

Who's
that
man
walking
across
the
water
silencing
the
roar
of
mature
chaos?

Love Enclosed in Skin

2005-07-09T09:17:00.000-04:00

Heart
stirring
power
drowning
in
energy
hurtling
into
space
what
manner
of
Man
is
this—
ghostly
haunting
our
nerve
endings.
Fire
igniting
in
our
chests
stripping
the
images
all
away.

Hurricane-Star-Love-Visit

2005-07-09T09:15:00.000-04:00

Were
you
there
when
U.G.
came
to
town?
Magic
filled
the
air.
Numberless
Jolts
of
Energy
shocked
us
awake
from
our
humdrum
routine.
How
could
we
take
another
minute
with
him?
Then
he
leaves.
We
are
shattered.
How
could
we
not
be
with
him?
Maybe
we
could
follow—
carry
suitcases
answer
phones
buy
white chocolate(?)
potato chips(?)
anything
we'll
do
anything
not
to
leave
that
love.
Then
we
almost
but
not
quite
forget,
and
suddenly
he's
back—
and
we
drown
again
in
the
Magic.

Prime Time

2005-07-09T09:12:00.000-04:00

The
moment
when
the
long
wait
is
over.
U.G.
comes
sailing
across
the
desert
through
the
mountains
to
here.
Nothing
can
stop
him
now.
Love
my
parents
never
could
give.
Truth
my
teachers
never
heard
of.
Peace
nowhere
to
be
found
in
my
meditations.
Freedom
beyond
all
imagining.
U.G.
my
heart
is
yours.
Don't
stop
long
for
gas.

Shook Up

2005-07-09T09:09:00.000-04:00

"I'm
coming
in
November
instead
of
the
end
of
September."
How
can
our
hearts
hold
still
that
long?
We
want
to
fly
immediately
to
Switzerland.
Can
we
really
last
till
November
with
this
awful
ambiguity?
We're
neither
here
nor
there
inside
our
lives
or
out.
We
are
swirling
in
the
cosmic
dust
bowl
of
U.G.
We
want
to
be
spun
into
the
stars
if
only
we
don't
have
to
leave
home.

B.U.G.

2005-07-09T09:07:00.000-04:00

Before
U.G.
we
were simply
complex
human
struggling
caught
in
the
strangle hold
of
thought
now
after
U.G.
we
are
dazed
wandering
dangling
between
two
worlds
the
bomb
has
been
dropped
we
are
the
mutants.
"Buddy,
you
ain't
got
a
chance."
All
our
so
very
important
purposes
plans
destinations
seem
to
have
dissolved
what
to
do
now
wandering
through
the
void
eating
white
chocolate
we
did
have
a
goal
once
you
remember
don't
you?
And
we
can't
even
take
our
own
dissolution
seriously
stuck
between
not being
and
being
our
heart
aches
for
you
U.G.
come
back
quickly
because
the
love
is
worth
the
dying.

Finish the Job, Quickly

2005-07-09T09:04:00.000-04:00

U.G.
since
you
came
into
his
life
there
has
been
no
peace.
All
that
was
familiar
comfortable
has
been
wrenched
away.
He
is
left
dangling
between
who
he
was
then
and
who
he
is
not
yet
now.
Your
grace
has
stripped
him
of
everything.
But
to
all
outer
appearances
he
is
just
fine
the
inner
agony
so
deep
and
unrelenting
only
you
can
see
it
only
you
can
heal
it.
He
is
ready
to
be
taken
out
of
the
picture.
Don't
hesitate
to
fan
the
fire
you
started.
If
the
way
is
only
through
the
flames,
let
the
fire
roar.

The Look

2005-07-09T09:00:00.000-04:00

The
first
look
we
got
from
U.G.—
a
swift
glance
so
penetrating
comprehensive
seeing
everything
we
were
are
will be—
in
that
instant
all
changed
forever
for
us
we
can't
go
back
to
who
we
were
before
that
fatal
look.
That
look
is
still
with
us
now
and
will
be
with
us
throughout
all
our
days
the
total
searching
look
of
the
universe
calling
us
to
destiny.
"Buddy,
you
ain't
got
a
chance."
"The
shortest
rope
and
the
tallest
tree."
"You're
a
goner."
The
look
is
working
its
magic
in
each
one
of
us
right
now
releasing
us
from
the
heavy
bonds
of
this
earthly
life.
One
look
was
all
we
needed
to
strike
eternity
in
our
hearts.

Viral U.G.

2005-07-09T08:57:00.000-04:00

Once
he
gets
into
your
system
there's
no
getting
him
out.
"You're
a
goner."
"Find
the
highest
tree
with
the
shortest
rope."
And
we
were
doing
so
well,
really
making
it
in
the
world
just
wanting
a
little
pretend
change
nothing
too
traumatic.
Now
we
can't
get
rid
of
him
he's
everywhere
lurking
behind
our
every
thought
stripping
us
to
the
gills
(and
we
thought
we
had
lost
everything).
Happy
contagion
so
we
go
down
kicking
and
screaming.
Still,
it's
Love's
own
feast
gnawing
our
entrails.
Our
bones
may
quake
in
fear
crushed
to
the
limits
of
our
capacity
not
to
let go.
Still
the
joyous
horror
of
this
moment
we
would
not
give up
for
forty
worlds.
How
could
we
possibly
go
back
even
if
we
could
and
we
can't—
no
penicillin
ever
made
can
ever
cure
us
of
this
strange
affliction
loving
us
free.

Trouble at the Center: For Goners Only

2005-07-09T08:43:00.000-04:00

U.G.
you
woke
us
from
an
uneasy
sleep.
Now
we
don't
know
what
to
do
with
our
heads
in
Albuquerque
Monterey
Mill Valley
New York
Chicago
Bangalore
Bombay
and
our
hearts
with
you.
If
only
you
hadn't
shown up
when
you
did
if
only
we
had
been
a
little
less
open
we
could
still
be
sleeping!

The U.G. Gang

2005-07-09T08:39:00.001-04:00

Bhakti-blasted
wiped out
stripped
to
the
core—
we
come
from
all
over
to
be
shredded
in
the
U.G.-
people-
shredder
we
who
have
given
up
the
peace
of
a
secure
premise
stumble
into
U.G.'s
midst
wondering
what's
left
to
lose
aching
with
the
pain
of
our
lost
innocence
till
those
eyes
of
love
catch
us
on
fire,
again.

Truth Serum

2005-07-09T08:38:00.000-04:00

After
hanging out
with
U.G.
how
false
how
shallow
every
word
coming
from
the
sincerest
of
voices.
No
matter
how
fierce
their
protestations
of
innocence
all
we
can
hear
is
the
hollow
ring
at
the
core.
Once
having
heard
U.G.
only
Love
will
do.

Until He Came

2005-07-09T08:37:00.000-04:00

I
used
to
want
more
out
of
life
until
U.G.
came.
Now
I
don't
know
what
more
means
and
I can't
find
my
life.
It
was
here
awhile
ago.
U.G.
you've
knocked
my
socks
off.
I
feel
slam-dunked.
What
happened
to
me?
Did
anything
really
happen?
Why
can't
I
find
the
lost
thread
of
meaning?
Everything
is
just
fine
but
my
purpose
has
been
blown.
I
can't
find
out
why
I'm
doing
anything
anymore.
And
you
won't
help
put
it
all
together
again—
Thank
God.

U.G. Fan Club

2005-07-09T08:35:00.001-04:00

Hail
fellow
travelers
down
the
nowhere-
path.
You
there
brothers
and
sisters
in
emptiness
waiting
there
for
nothing
to
happen.
You
there
in
Bangalore
California
New York
Bombay
Amsterdam
Hong Kong
Sidney
Albuquerque even
what
can
we
do,
we
love
him
beyond
all
good
sense.
How
can
you
tell
if
you
are
hooked
by
the
U.G.-
virus?
Have
all
your
paths
dried
up
are
you
going
nowhere
with
dexterity
saving
your
money
for
a
summer
trip
to
Gstaad?
Ready
to
leave
it
all
at
a
moment's
notice?
What
can
we
do,
we
love
him.
Has
kindly
Dr. Death
got
your
number
too?
"Have
a
piece
of
white
chocolate—"
with
utter
gentleness
he
sweeps
clean
our
insides
taking
all
the
sweet
false
away
with
him
smiling
joking
laughing
peeking
at
us
so
softly
from
behind
his
sly
oblivion.
What
can
we
do—
sisters
and
brothers
of
nowhere-
left-
to-
go—
we
love
him.

Walking Dead Man

2005-07-09T08:10:00.000-04:00

Happy
Birthday
U.G.
seventy-five
years
old
and
you're
not
even
alive.
When
we
see
you
we
think
we
see
you
but
all
we
see
is
the
memory
of
the
time
you
were—
like
a
star
we
see
that's
already
millions
of
years
away
when
we
see
it—
Who
you
really are
has
already
melted
into
the
pores
of
the
universe
a
long
time
ago.
We
see
you
from
millions
of
light-years
ago
a
glorious
comet
flashing
across
our
minds
scorching
our
hearts
with
yearning
for
the
Light
of
your
awakening.
Happy
Birthday
Jivan-
Mukta.
"Not
Jivan-
Mukta!"
Friend.

What If...

2005-07-09T08:06:00.000-04:00

What
if
we
get
the
calamity
and
we
don't
know
it.
Everything
will
be
different
but
we
won't
know
it.
(We
won't
know
if
it's
the
same
either.)
Will
we
like
it?
How
can
we
like
it
when
we
don't
know
we're
in
it?
But
there
is
some
pay
off,
right?
(We
just
won't
know
we
are
getting
it.)
Still,
calamity
is
better
than
no
calamity,
isn't
it?
Come
on,
U.G.
tell
us!
(And
he
won't
say
a
word.)

Almost Wanting Enlightenment

2005-07-09T08:02:00.000-04:00

U.G.
we
love
you
we
want
to
be
with
you
we
want
to
feel
your
peace
your
joy
your
incredible
freedom
we
want
what
you
have
we
just
don't
want
what
you
are.
Not
that!—
the
end
of
us!
Waking
death!
No
more
me!
We
like
being
with
you
just
so
we
don't
have
to
die.
We're
willing
for
others
to
die
just
not
us.
We're
even
willing
to
die
ourselves
someday
just
not
now.
Now
we
like
being
with
you
so
please
don't
kill
us
off
at
least
not
yet.

Splintered

2005-07-09T07:58:00.000-04:00

The
moment
you
touched
me
I
fell
apart.
Now
I
pretend
to
live
as
if
I'm
still
whole
and
functional
I'm
doing
something
real
in
the
world.
But
underneath
deep
inside
I'm
lost.
Only
your
love
holds
me
together.
A
dream
of
you
is
more
real
than
all
the
people
in
my
world.
Since
there's
nothing
left
but
you
and
you
aren't
here
where
am
I?
Whether
you
pick
up
the
pieces
or
not,
this
Humpty
Dumpty
will
always
love
you.

U.G.'s Miracle

2005-07-09T07:56:00.001-04:00

The
Zen
Master's
miracle
is
when
he
is
hungry
he
eats
thirsty
he
drinks
U.G.'s
miracle
is
that
he
is.
He's
outside
of
the
world
so
no
ups
or
downs
for
him.
He
goes
to
the
shopping
mall
instead
of
the
great
mountain.
Where
is
not
Heaven
for
him?
He
hangs
out
with
losers
like
us.
Who
is
not
holy
to
him?
He
eats
canned
tomatoes
and
drinks
whole
cream.
What
are
preservatives
and
cholesterol
to
him?
He
prefers
Las Vegas
to
the
Grand Canyon
or
even
Sedona:
the
vortices
are
small
dots
of
insignificance
before
his
imperious
presence.
The
Canyon
"just
a
big
hole."
The
whole
earth
itself
with
all
its
power
pomp
and
circumstance
is
just
a
speck
of
dust
in
the
eternity
of
U.G.'s
flashing
eyes.

God's Hit Man

2005-07-09T07:54:00.000-04:00

The
one
mistake
we
can
make
is
when
we
underestimate
U.G.
We
think
he
is
just
a
kindly
blaster
who
only
wants
to
remove
our
defects
so
that
we
get
on
with
making
it
big
in
the
world.
But
he's
not
kidding
buddy.
He's
not
here
to
gently
shrink
our
ego.
He's
come
to
kill
us
off.
He's
the
cosmic
assassin
come
to
take
it
all
away.
Don't
even
hope
for
a
tiny
drop
of
you
to
be
left.
So
we
meet
U.G.
when
our
time
is
up.
U.G.
is
a
vast
furnace
of
Love
in
which
we
are
melting.
We measure
the
walls,
we
note
the
time,
we
gauge
our
"progress",
we
confer
on
the
heat
as
we
sink
into
oblivion.

Ion Man

2005-07-09T07:50:00.000-04:00

Whatever
you
throw
at
U.G.
he
evaporates
throw
your
questions
throw
your
fears
doubts
worries
hopes
your
plans
for
the
future
throw
your
loves
attachments
he
doesn't
blink
man
he
dissolves
it
all
Oh
well
you
finally
throw
yourself.

On Fire with the Fire Of Fire

2005-07-09T07:49:00.000-04:00

Fire
can't
burn
itself.
Out
of
the
smoldering
ashes
of
his
calamity
comes
U.G.
Burning
embers
his
eyes
poke
holes
in
our
embarassment
at
being
not
someone
else.
If
only
we
were
better
more
comfortable
inside
our
skin
we
wouldn't
mind
(we think)
U.G.'s fiery
glance.
We
are
so
afraid
that
he
will
discover
how
little
we
are
and
we
try
so
hard
to
look
like
we
have
it
together
but
the
fire
has
already
consumed
us.
We're
only
smoke
forgetting
to
evaporate
because
we
hope
something
more
will
come.

What a Friend We Have in U.G.

2005-07-09T07:45:00.000-04:00

Oh
God
if
U.G.
doesn't
come
soon
or
at
least
call
I
think
I'll
die
even
if
I
don't
die
you
call
this
living
suspended
between
two
worlds
pretending
to
goals
no
longer
mine
too
chicken
to
drop
everything
and
be
swallowed
into
the
void
U.G.
come
dissolve
the
space
between
us
once
more
until
there
is
nothing
left
but
you
and
then
you
dissolve.

Don't Gamble

2005-07-09T07:43:00.000-04:00

U.G.
says
"We
gamble
with
our
lives,
that's
enough."
When
will
we
find
the
place
of
peace
in
this
life?
U.G.
how
long
before
our
goose
is
cooked
enough?
Some
of
us
die
while
waiting
to
Die.
"We'll
all
be
enlightened
two
seconds
before
the
end."
Why
can't
we
not
mind
the
pain
of
not
being
There
yet?

With U.G.

2005-07-09T07:41:00.000-04:00

"No
one
is
insignificant
no
one
is
special.
Everyone
is
on
the
spot.
Everything
is
up
in
the
air."
How
could
it
be
otherwise?
U.G.
brings
us
to
ourselves.
We
can't
not
be
aware
when
we
are
with
him.
Sleepwalking
normal
reality
is
OK
for
a while
but
how
we
long
to
feel
that
sharp
awakening
in
our
bones
when
we
are
with
him!

Useless Guy

2005-07-09T07:40:00.000-04:00

Of
what
good
is
U.G.?
He
never
pats
our
ego.
He
never
says
what
we
want
to
hear.
He
always
interrupts
our
fantasy
of
getting
better.
What
a
guy!
He
never
comforts
our
despair
or
commiserates
with
our
misery.
He
never
turns
a
blind
eye
to
our
weakness.
So
of
what
use
is
this
guy
to
us?
Yet
for
one
minute
with
him
we
would
turn
our
backs
on
paradise.

Gucci Shoes

2005-07-09T07:39:00.000-04:00

U.G.
slam-dunks
the
old
Gucci
shoes
in
the
garbage
bin
in
Central
Park.
"But
they
cost
$200."
"Someone
will
find
them."
Imagine:
an
old
wandering
derelict
shambles
up
to
the
garbage
bin
peers
inside
grabs
the
shoes
puts
them
on
dances
up
into
the
sky.

Lord of the Cosmos

2005-07-09T07:37:00.000-04:00

U.G.
walking
through
the
Monterey
Airport
surveying
his
domain
owner
of
the
universe
and
everything
in
it—
Loaning
it
out
to
God
for
a while.

The Original Man

2005-07-09T07:36:00.000-04:00

A
tiny
tiny
bit
of
unmolested
Energy
let
loose
inside
wreaking
Joyous
havoc
everywhere.

Swami Without a Robe

2005-07-09T07:35:00.000-04:00

The
Universe
is
your
Ashram
the
planet
your
Stupa
Humanity
your
adherents
Truth
your
God
Love
your
being
Dissolving
your
teaching
Nothing
your
self
as
you
melt
into
it
all.

Dilemma

2005-07-09T07:34:00.000-04:00

We
live
like
ants
fulfilling
purposes
not
our
own.
Then
one
day
we
meet
U.G.
and
the
myth
of
our
inner
clarity
explodes.
While
we
pick
up
the
pieces
which
no
longer
fit
together
we
wonder:
how
could
we
not
want
to
live
with
that
Love
so
at
cross-direction
from
everything
we
know?

U.G.: Unlikely Holy Man

2005-07-09T07:30:00.001-04:00

Not
holy,
Not
a man?
He looks
like
my
grandmother
sometimes.
He
was
a
rascal
as
a
child.
He's
still
a
rascal.
He
wants
to
steal
our
self-importance
from
us.
All
that
he'll
give
in
return
is
the
Real.
But
what
we
want
is
to
feel
very
good
about
our
illusions.
U.G.
doesn't
play
fair.
After
all,
our
illusions
are
more
profound
at
a
deeper
level
and
have
been
certified by
people-in-the-know.
So
why
does
U.G.
dismiss
them
(and
us
too!)
in
one
quick
glance?

U.G. Dance

2005-07-09T07:29:00.001-04:00

I
wanted
this
time
to
tell
you
how
glad
I
am
to
be
with
you
but
the
words
never
came.
I
know
when
we
speak
heart
to
heart
there
is
no
need
of
words.
Sometimes
I
feel
so
totally
with
you
that
there
are
no
others
but
us
in
the
universe.
Sometimes
I
feel
so
far
away
that
even
with
you
in
the
same
room
sitting
next
to
me
the
vast
abyss
between
us
will
never
let
me
enter.
Sometimes
my
heart
burns
in
the
fire
of
your
love.
Sometimes
it's
all
ashes
and
I
can't
find
you
anywhere
inside
or
out.
Yet
there
is
always
the
instant
of
your
sudden
appearance
and
my
heart
trembles
with
dreadful
joy.

Resting in Our Non-Arrival

2005-07-09T07:25:00.000-04:00

The purpose
of
the
dance
is the dance.
We learn
from
U.G.
by
staying
away
from
U.G.
"They got what they came for."
Now they go home.
We all get
what we come for.
We all go home.
What did we get?
No more mind.
So we don't mind
no more.
Let
that
No mind
be in
you.

Word-Bullet — II

2005-07-09T07:21:00.000-04:00

"I
hold
the
words
out
maybe
who
knows
you'll
get
hit
by
one
or
two"
Maybe
one
word
hitting
just
right
worth
a
lifetime
of
Nothing
happening
No
matter
how
hard
we
try
Maybe
that
word
will
sneak
past
all
the
guards
Touch
our
hearts
beyond
reckoning
Pull
us
into
Life.